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The autobiographical documentary "The Betrayal" (2008), by Thavisouk Phrasavath (Thavi) and Ellen Kuras, is a painful poignant look at Thavi's family's involvement with the Vietnam war, that devastated his small country of Laos and tore his and many other families apart - leaving social, cultural, economic and psychological scars that they must struggle with for generations to come, But, above all this trauma (of military conflict and combat) is the social and political betrayal that Thavisouk and his family, and so many like his, are forced to endure - over and over again. They were betrayed by Americans, that Thavi's father loyally served, the American government, whose policies towards refugees have been careless and half hearted, and by America itself, a country Thavi's family migrated to with hope and excitement - only to find that it offered its own version of "hell".
There is no anger in Thavi as he interviews various members of his family, in Brooklyn, New York (where they were forced to settle) and back in Laos (where his grandparents and two siblings were left behind during their escape to Thailand), while they reveal their losses, grief, emotional bruises, pain, suffering, fears, confusions, conflicts and tears....These are people who endured the kind of cruelties we cannot imagine - not even soldiers in uniforms with guns and orders to kill can.
Thavi's family saw their village bombed, many of their neighbors shot and killed, women being raped and brutalized, bodies of dead babies and children strewn all over their beautiful lush country side. They had members of their families taken away under a gun point in the middle of the night...never to return. They saw horrors that we could only read about, watch on TV and hear from people like them. And their grief never stops after the war.
Thavi's father was taken away by the opposing army once the Americans pulled out without any protection for all the locals who had fought with them. Many were betrayed by the Americans they had served with their blood and their lives. Thavi's mother was forced to care for her nine children in utter poverty and devastation once her husband disappeared, and there was no American to even throw a few handouts. They were constantly starving and afraid for their lives.
After years of desperate living in poverty and paranoia Thavi's mother bribed a fishermen to take her and her family to Thailand - where there was a refugee camp. They escaped in an old wooden boat, with 17 other people, holding on to their lives...afraid they'd drown in the middle of a river in a middle of their journey of hope. Once they reached the refugee camps in Thailand new problems began to plague them.
Refugee camps were overcrowded, unhygienic, unhealthy and under-served. They went hungry many days, begged for food, picked trash for clothes and fell sick often. After several years of hunger, begging and a humiliating life their hopeful wait was answered with visas and one-way tickets to the US of A - a country that was presented to them as paradise with "running water, indoor plumbing and lights in every room".
Thavi and his family arrived in New York city only to be stranded for many hours without anyone to pick them up and provide them with helpful information. Their sponsor did arrive, after hours of delay, without an open arm, a smile, flowers or food. They had dreamt of this moment of arrival to the American shores for decades, and had hoped to be received with some thoughtfulness and kindness. In stead, an officious man, with no sensitivity, warmth or compassion for his new clients and co-citizens, shows up late and takes them in a hot van to dump them at an old dilapidated building, that was once a crack house, in a crowded crime ridden part of Brooklyn. This was to be their new home...and a different nightmare ensued for this already devastated traumatized tired family.
Brooklyn, where they settled in the 1980s, was high on drugs, crime and gangs. They were surrounded by people who did not speak their language, care for them or connect with them. They were now unwanted and misunderstood strangers, isolated, alienated and many times treated with prejudice, stuck in the margins and at the bottom of the American socio-economic political ladder.
Their dreams of America were crushed when, on their first day, they were thrust into one room of an apartment - all eight of them, to be shared with another Vietnamese family of seven. The family was left with one bag of rice and no utensils to cook it in. Their sponsor had not bothered to find out if they had even eaten after an exhausting flight followed by a long wait at the airport. Nor were there any efforts made to evaluate their basic needs, like food and clothes, for their first few weeks in the US as they tried to settle in and adjust. Welcome to paradise and the land of the free - where once you come, are allowed to enter, you are thrown to the sharks. You either swim - and few do ; drown - most do ; or merely float - sometimes with a glazed look in their eyes (as Thavi's mother describes some of the American youngsters).
Life for Thavi's family was hard...living on welfare and food stamps that was never enough or adequate. His siblings went to poorly run schools where drugs, drinks and gangs ruled kids' lives. Several of his siblings dropped out, few joined gangs, many did drugs and most hung out in street corners with nothing to do - disrespectful to their elders, their culture, and their own mother who had once begged to save them. Above all most seemed clueless about their own past and what their family had endured (and why). The past you don't know you might be forced to relive or be victimized by - all over again.
The family managed to eke out a frugal difficult living in Brooklyn. One day, after seventeen years, they received a call from their father - who was alive and living in Miami. He came to visit them, and Thavi, the son who ached for his father the most, excitedly looked forward to his parents reuniting and the family - for the first time - resolving all their years of painful separations, struggles and suffering.
While the time with their father was wonderful, exciting and hopeful, Thavi's family learned, to their disappointment, that their father had another wife and children in Miami: a woman he had met in Thailand and married after 13 years of staying away from his family to protect them, and later futilely trying to find them. Thavi's mother was heartbroken again! One wonders how many heartaches and heartbreaks a woman can take.
Thavi's mother deals with this devastating news as gracefully as she can - with her cultural stoicism, traditional rituals of healing and forgiveness, and her Buddhist faith. It is truly amazing what some people endure and then attempt to forgive - an admirable quality, and one that might be good for mental health sometimes. Though legitmate anger at the bigger systems of combat and exploitation is also acceptable.
Faith and forgiveness must not make us forget, or deceive us into forgiving the wrong people or the wrong system. For the self absorbed narcissist will kill a woman and then run to her mother for forgiveness, with cooked up tears, reasons, rationale and pretentious regrets. Once he is forgiven, and does not pay with his future, savings, wealth, power, privilege or his life, he will commit the same heinous crimes over and over again. Hence,Thavisouk Phrasavath (Thavi) should not forget, there will be betrayals over and over again!
Thavi's father admits that he regrets having collaborated with the Americans who made him drop bombs on his own country...and in the end bombed his family's unity, welfare, success and happiness. While he takes responsibility for some of the things he did...not a single American leader, businessman or military personnel was ever questioned, or showed remorse and regret.
But why exclusively blame a man who was a mere "foot soldier" - following instructions and co-opting with the big boys with the big power and the big guns...when these big boys in power, who unleashed chaos, madness and murders on other cultures and countries, are rarely included in documentaries like these, and contnue to remain hidden, comfortable and powerful.
From a famous Hitchcock movie "Gaslight" (1944) the term "gaslighting" was coined -to refer to processes or methods that distort truth and/or reality, thereby shifting focus and removing blame from the real perpetrators. In "gaslighting" arguments are shrewdly twisted, words are cunningly redefined, events are presented with slanted lens and some facts are deliberately left out or distorted - creating the opposite reality, away from the real truth. Such maneavors make the innocent and the real victims insane, and shifts the blame and focus away from real criminals and perpetrators.
While this documentary is poignant, emotional and courageous - it is incomplete. To really break the cycle of destrution and control, that is unleashed on innocent communities and cultures, so families never have to go through what Thavi and his family did, we need a Part II to this documentary...titled, "Betrayal and Beyond: Pursuit with a Purpose, Prosecution with Fairness and Full Legal Conviction with Compassion". Not the other way around!
The autobiographical documentary "The Betrayal" (2008), by Thavisouk Phrasavath (Thavi) and Ellen Kuras, is a painful poignant look at Thavi's family's involvement with the Vietnam war, that devastated his small country of Laos and tore his and many other families apart - leaving social, cultural, economic and psychological scars that they must struggle with for generations to come, But, above all this trauma (of military conflict and combat) is the social and political betrayal that Thavisouk and his family, and so many like his, are forced to endure - over and over again. They were betrayed by Americans, that Thavi's father loyally served, the American government, whose policies towards refugees have been careless and half hearted, and by America itself, a country Thavi's family migrated to with hope and excitement - only to find that it offered its own version of "hell".
There is no anger in Thavi as he interviews various members of his family, in Brooklyn, New York (where they were forced to settle) and back in Laos (where his grandparents and two siblings were left behind during their escape to Thailand), while they reveal their losses, grief, emotional bruises, pain, suffering, fears, confusions, conflicts and tears....These are people who endured the kind of cruelties we cannot imagine - not even soldiers in uniforms with guns and orders to kill can.
Thavi's family saw their village bombed, many of their neighbors shot and killed, women being raped and brutalized, bodies of dead babies and children strewn all over their beautiful lush country side. They had members of their families taken away under a gun point in the middle of the night...never to return. They saw horrors that we could only read about, watch on TV and hear from people like them. And their grief never stops after the war.
Thavi's father was taken away by the opposing army once the Americans pulled out without any protection for all the locals who had fought with them. Many were betrayed by the Americans they had served with their blood and their lives. Thavi's mother was forced to care for her nine children in utter poverty and devastation once her husband disappeared, and there was no American to even throw a few handouts. They were constantly starving and afraid for their lives.
After years of desperate living in poverty and paranoia Thavi's mother bribed a fishermen to take her and her family to Thailand - where there was a refugee camp. They escaped in an old wooden boat, with 17 other people, holding on to their lives...afraid they'd drown in the middle of a river in a middle of their journey of hope. Once they reached the refugee camps in Thailand new problems began to plague them.
Refugee camps were overcrowded, unhygienic, unhealthy and under-served. They went hungry many days, begged for food, picked trash for clothes and fell sick often. After several years of hunger, begging and a humiliating life their hopeful wait was answered with visas and one-way tickets to the US of A - a country that was presented to them as paradise with "running water, indoor plumbing and lights in every room".
Thavi and his family arrived in New York city only to be stranded for many hours without anyone to pick them up and provide them with helpful information. Their sponsor did arrive, after hours of delay, without an open arm, a smile, flowers or food. They had dreamt of this moment of arrival to the American shores for decades, and had hoped to be received with some thoughtfulness and kindness. In stead, an officious man, with no sensitivity, warmth or compassion for his new clients and co-citizens, shows up late and takes them in a hot van to dump them at an old dilapidated building, that was once a crack house, in a crowded crime ridden part of Brooklyn. This was to be their new home...and a different nightmare ensued for this already devastated traumatized tired family.
Brooklyn, where they settled in the 1980s, was high on drugs, crime and gangs. They were surrounded by people who did not speak their language, care for them or connect with them. They were now unwanted and misunderstood strangers, isolated, alienated and many times treated with prejudice, stuck in the margins and at the bottom of the American socio-economic political ladder.
Their dreams of America were crushed when, on their first day, they were thrust into one room of an apartment - all eight of them, to be shared with another Vietnamese family of seven. The family was left with one bag of rice and no utensils to cook it in. Their sponsor had not bothered to find out if they had even eaten after an exhausting flight followed by a long wait at the airport. Nor were there any efforts made to evaluate their basic needs, like food and clothes, for their first few weeks in the US as they tried to settle in and adjust. Welcome to paradise and the land of the free - where once you come, are allowed to enter, you are thrown to the sharks. You either swim - and few do ; drown - most do ; or merely float - sometimes with a glazed look in their eyes (as Thavi's mother describes some of the American youngsters).
Life for Thavi's family was hard...living on welfare and food stamps that was never enough or adequate. His siblings went to poorly run schools where drugs, drinks and gangs ruled kids' lives. Several of his siblings dropped out, few joined gangs, many did drugs and most hung out in street corners with nothing to do - disrespectful to their elders, their culture, and their own mother who had once begged to save them. Above all most seemed clueless about their own past and what their family had endured (and why). The past you don't know you might be forced to relive or be victimized by - all over again.
The family managed to eke out a frugal difficult living in Brooklyn. One day, after seventeen years, they received a call from their father - who was alive and living in Miami. He came to visit them, and Thavi, the son who ached for his father the most, excitedly looked forward to his parents reuniting and the family - for the first time - resolving all their years of painful separations, struggles and suffering.
While the time with their father was wonderful, exciting and hopeful, Thavi's family learned, to their disappointment, that their father had another wife and children in Miami: a woman he had met in Thailand and married after 13 years of staying away from his family to protect them, and later futilely trying to find them. Thavi's mother was heartbroken again! One wonders how many heartaches and heartbreaks a woman can take.
Thavi's mother deals with this devastating news as gracefully as she can - with her cultural stoicism, traditional rituals of healing and forgiveness, and her Buddhist faith. It is truly amazing what some people endure and then attempt to forgive - an admirable quality, and one that might be good for mental health sometimes. Though legitmate anger at the bigger systems of combat and exploitation is also acceptable.
Faith and forgiveness must not make us forget, or deceive us into forgiving the wrong people or the wrong system. For the self absorbed narcissist will kill a woman and then run to her mother for forgiveness, with cooked up tears, reasons, rationale and pretentious regrets. Once he is forgiven, and does not pay with his future, savings, wealth, power, privilege or his life, he will commit the same heinous crimes over and over again. Hence,Thavisouk Phrasavath (Thavi) should not forget, there will be betrayals over and over again!
Thavi's father admits that he regrets having collaborated with the Americans who made him drop bombs on his own country...and in the end bombed his family's unity, welfare, success and happiness. While he takes responsibility for some of the things he did...not a single American leader, businessman or military personnel was ever questioned, or showed remorse and regret.
But why exclusively blame a man who was a mere "foot soldier" - following instructions and co-opting with the big boys with the big power and the big guns...when these big boys in power, who unleashed chaos, madness and murders on other cultures and countries, are rarely included in documentaries like these, and contnue to remain hidden, comfortable and powerful.
From a famous Hitchcock movie "Gaslight" (1944) the term "gaslighting" was coined -to refer to processes or methods that distort truth and/or reality, thereby shifting focus and removing blame from the real perpetrators. In "gaslighting" arguments are shrewdly twisted, words are cunningly redefined, events are presented with slanted lens and some facts are deliberately left out or distorted - creating the opposite reality, away from the real truth. Such maneavors make the innocent and the real victims insane, and shifts the blame and focus away from real criminals and perpetrators.
While this documentary is poignant, emotional and courageous - it is incomplete. To really break the cycle of destrution and control, that is unleashed on innocent communities and cultures, so families never have to go through what Thavi and his family did, we need a Part II to this documentary...titled, "Betrayal and Beyond: Pursuit with a Purpose, Prosecution with Fairness and Full Legal Conviction with Compassion". Not the other way around!
Dr.Srinbhasan, I am sending this article to everybody in my family. It is very good and I am going to see this documentary. I hope Thavi makes part II "for prosecution and compensation". Thank you Dr. May you have a long life and a good one.
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